Use `may_exist` in Hash Join

[lmatz]

The refilling is most valuable when inserting a join key that does not exist before, and is less useful when the join key already exist. So it would be better is we can have a bloom filter API from storage, so that we can only write then the join key does not exist (in bloom filter).

Originally posted by @yuhao-su in #7393 (comment)

After #7489, we now can implement this strategy